Chapter 10 - THE MAN WHO CARRIED MY SECRET

I recognized the box by the crushed silver bow. In the hospital Laura had brought it to me from Mr. Salazar, so at some point Alex had put it back inside. I couldn't stop thinking about what he might have seen in those eleven minutes.
I called him before Nia could tell me not to.
He answered on the second ring. "Erin? Are you okay?"
"You carried my box outside."
Silence.
"Did you open it?"
"I thought it was important."
"That's not what I asked."
I heard traffic, then his turn signal ticking. "I saw the test."
I sat down on the kitchen floor. "When?"
"Before we came to get the storage key. I saw the corner sticking out when you pulled it away. I wasn't sure."
"You were sure enough to mention it to Paige."
He made a small choking sound. "I didn't know what was happening on the stairs."
"I told you to call somebody."
"You were barely talking."
"So you left?"
"Paige thought you'd call the cops. I thought— I don't know what I thought."
For six years Alex could sell a room full of skeptical contractors on a plan scribbled on a napkin. Now he couldn't finish a sentence.
"How much do you remember?" he asked.
"Enough."
"Did the doctor say the baby is okay?"
I wanted to say no. I wanted him to feel the particular terror of a question nobody could answer. Instead, I said, "There's a heartbeat. They are watching the bleeding."
He started to cry quietly. I had heard him cry only twice: at his grandfather's funeral and after our first miscarriage.
"Can I see you?"
"Not without my lawyer."
I hung up before he could tell me he loved me.
The next morning Nia arranged a meeting at her office with Alex and his attorney. Alex arrived alone, wearing the same watch I'd given him when he landed his first major construction contract. It had a new scratch across the glass.
He apologized before sitting down.
"I didn't mean for you to fall."
"I believe that," I said. He looked relieved. "I also believe you could have helped me and chose not to."
The relief disappeared.
Nia asked about the eleven minutes. Alex said he'd frozen. Paige had suggested he leave before the police arrived. He had driven around the block twice and talked himself into believing a neighbor would find me.
"I knew it was wrong," he said. "I did it anyway."
No one spoke for a while. The office refrigerator hummed through the wall.
Then Alex's attorney opened another file. "Before we can negotiate support or parenting provisions, Mr. Mercer would like to discuss paternity."
Alex stared at the table as if he'd never heard the word before.
"You want to know whether the baby is yours?" I asked.
May you like
He didn't look up.